Irene Scarpati, loving wife, mother, homemaker

by Carolyn James

Throughout her life, Irene Scarpati maintained an optimistic outlook and always put the needs of others before her own. Even when she was diagnosed with cancer four years ago, she continued to work, care for her home and family and focus on life.

"She never looked at her problems; she never wanted anyone to fuss over her," said her daughter Jessica. "Your problems were always more important to her."

Irene Scarpati died May 31, 2004 with her family by her side.

Born in Queens, she attended New York City public schools where she met her future husband.

"We met in biology class and she shared her homework with me," said her husband Joseph. Even now, the thought brings a smile to his face. "We were high school sweethearts," he said. The couple was married 25 years.

By far, her favorite pastime was cooking. "I think it was an emotional thing for her," said her daughter, a former reporter with the Massapequa Post newspaper. "It helped her fulfill her desire to care for people."

It wasn’t unusual for Mrs. Scarpati to cook three different main dishes for dinner to accommodate the tastes of her husband, son and daughter. "Her kitchen was like a diner; she could whip up whatever you wanted at any time." said Jessica.

Holidays in the Scarpati home were celebrated in grand style. She would begin baking cookies in early December and be up until 1 a.m., recalls her daughter.

"Then she’d be up again early in the morning to go to work," said her husband.

Every year the assortment of cookies got bigger and bigger as she kept adding to it when someone she knew said they had a favorite. "I think she enjoyed watching the look on people’s faces when they got those cookies," said Jessica.

Following her graduation from high school, Mrs. Scarpati went to work with her husband at a car dealership. She also worked with Mack Markowitz Oldsmobile in Hempstead, Dobler Chevrolet, and Franklin Square Ford since 1991.

"She was the strongest, bravest person I ever met," said Jerry Yedid, the owner of Franklin Square Ford. "Even when she was sick you never heard her complain once. She never showed fear of dying and her only concern was for her family and the business. We all loved her."

What her daughter remembers most about her mother, however, is the deep devotion she had to her and her brother. "She always made us feel special," she said.

Jessica recalls how one day the family was riding in the car and her brother Brian became uncomfortable with the sunshine that came through the window. "My mother told him she would shut off the sun for him if she could," said Jessica. "And I know that if she could do it, she would."

Mrs. Scarpati left her children with a desire for life and a willingness to take chances. "She always said live your life any way you want, but don’t let anyone rip you off," said Jessica. "It was her way of saying experience life but always be cautious and skeptical."

Life for Mrs. Scarpati was filled with family, fun and optimism. She would think nothing of getting into the car and taking a four-hour drive to the Amish Country in Pennsylvania to go to a favorite restaurant there for dinner. She, her husband and children also traveled, taking cruises to the Caribbean and Bahamas and visiting Canada.

"She was the quiet one and I was the loud, vivacious one," said her longtime friend Rochelle Donnino of East Northport. "We went well together and she was the most devoted friend you could ever have. She took her friendships very seriously."

In addition to her husband, son and daughter, Mrs. Scarpati is survived by her mother Paulina Usherson of Floral Park; her sister Joyce Kuzmana and her husband Bill of Surrey, Maine and her brother Fredrick and his wife Ellen of Hewlett.

A religious service was conducted by Rabbi Stanley Burstein of Temple Sholom, Westbury and burial followed in Pinelawn Memorial Park, Pinelawn.